


Plot Bunnies!

by artitech



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Wrong Boy-Who-Lived (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-30
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2020-02-10 10:29:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18658612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artitech/pseuds/artitech
Summary: Up for adoption! I'll link to your work if you adopt one!





	Plot Bunnies!

Adopted by PantasticPansexual!

What if Harry rejected his Hogwarts letter? Focused around Neville Longbottom, the forced bwl who is unable to complete his task due to not being the correct person. Eventual reintroduction of Harry after Neville dies fighting Voldemort.

 

Harry Potter was a simple boy. He lived with his Aunt Petunia, Uncle Vernon, and cousin, Dudley. They were a relatively normal family. Each morning, Petunia made yoghurt parfaits for the children and eggs for herself and Vernon. Vernon would tell the family about his business plans for the day as they sat around the table, and the children would pretend to know what he was talking about. After breakfast, Petunia would help the boys clean the dishes and get dressed, and then the two of them would walk to St. Grogory’s Primary School. After school, Harry and Dudley would go to the park with their friends, and at 4pm, Vernon would pick them up on the way back from work. At 4:30, they did their homework, and then from 5:30 to 6:30, they would eat. At 7 they would bathe and then watch a bit of television, finally going to sleep around 8. It was the same every day, and that was how Harry liked it.

You could imagine his surprise when something changed.

~~~~

It was a bright Wednesday, the last week of school, and Harry and Dudley were washing breakfast dishes when the mail came. Now, the mail came everyday (except Sunday). That wasn’t surprising. What was surprising, though, was Petunia’s screech when she rifled through it. Dudley shot off towards his mother with Harry close behind.

“Is everything alright, mum?” asked Dudley. He grabbed onto her arm and tried to peek at what she was looking at.

“G-go get your father,” whispered Petunia. Her knuckles grew white with the grip she had on the mail. Harry’s eyebrows furrowed, concerned. Dudley ran off to get Vernon. He came back, with an out-of-breath Vernon behind him. He stood next to his wife and took the mail, opening one letter and reading through the contents. His face got more and more red with each moment that passed.

“Absolutely not!” shouted Vernon, tearing the letter in two. “I refuse to let this happen!” Harry and Dudley glanced at each other. Neither had ever seen Vernon like this before. Petunia turned to Harry and placed a hand on his shoulder, crouching down to look him in the eyes.

“Has anything… strange… ever happened around you, Harry?” she asked apprehensively, worry flooding her expression. Behind her, Vernon began to turn purple.

“No, Aunt Petunia,” Harry replied. Why would anything strange happen? He was normal, just like his family.

“Oh, thank goodness. Nevermind this, then,” she said, relieved. She turned back to Vernon and whispered something in his ear. He relaxed and began to breathe again. Vernon sat down in one of the chairs in the living room.

“Off to school, you two,” said Petunia, and with a mutual shrug, both boys left.

During lunch, Harry noticed a tapping sound. An owl was perched on the outer windowsill of their classroom, tapping on the window. It appeared to have… Harry took off his glasses and cleaned them. It had an envelope clutched in its talons. _I must be imagining things_ , thought Harry. _Well, it is rather warm out today._ Harry had forgotten about it by the time maths started.

After school ended, Harry, Dudley, and their friends walked to the park. They played a long game of tag, and lay down in the grass when they had run themselves out of energy. All of a sudden, a huge brown thing came hurtling out of the bushes towards Harry. Dudley jumped up to bat the thing away, and it swerved, clawing the side of Dudley’s face as it moved. It redirected its course back to Harry, and he curled up into a ball, expecting the worst. He waited for the feeling of getting cut, but it never came. A huge smacking sound was heard. Harry uncovered his face, seeing his friend David holding a baseball bat in one hand and holding the other hand out to Harry. Harry took it and stood. On the ground lay a rather large brown bird.

“What is it?” asked David.

“I think it’s an owl,” answered Harry.

Harry suddenly remembered Dudley and turned to him. He gasped, seeing the three deep cuts into his face.

“We should get you home,” whispered Harry, eyes wide. Dudley nodded, tears starting to spring up in his eyes.

“We’ll see you guys later,” said Harry. Their friends nodded and went back to running around. Harry and Dudley walked slowly back to 4 Privet Drive. Harry blinked at the sight before him. He blinked again.

“Do you see this?” he asked Dudley. After a long moment, Dudley nodded.

“Stay back here, Dudley. I don’t want them to attack you again.” Harry took one step towards the front gate, and twenty or so pairs of owl eyes fixated on him.

“Okay. New plan. AUNT PETUNIA!” Harry shouted. She opened the front door, about to scold him for shouting, when she saw the mass of birds in her front lawn. She glared at them and disappeared for a moment, coming back with a broom.

“Shoo! Shoo, you good-for-nothing birds! Get away!” The owls eventually listened, flying up to perch on her roof. Petunia ushered her boys inside, locking the door firmly.

“Dudley! Oh my goodness, what happened?” she asked, wiping his tears away gently.

Dudley sat down in a chair in the dining room, and Harry and Petunia followed him. “There was something while we were at the park, and it was going to Harry, and I got in front of it, and ahhh, my face, mum! It hurts…”

“Oh, my poor Dudley… Harry, be a dear and fetch me the medical kit, will you?” Harry nodded, rushing up the stairs to grab it. As he ran back down her, he  could hear his aunt saying “Don’t worry, love, we’ll fix you up right quick. Don’t worry.”

“Here you go, Aunt Tunia,” said Harry, lifting the kit onto the table.

“Thank you dear,” she replied, gently dabbing the wounds with a bit of cotton. “Could you pass me the antiseptic?” And a moment later, “The suture needle now, dear.” Harry watched attentively as Petunia stitched up the first wound. Dudley’s breathing increased with each stitch. By the time the first wound was closed, he was nearly hyperventilating.

“C-can we take a break? Please?” asked Dudley in a strained voice.

“Of course dear.” For a moment, Petunia cleaned the second wound. “Ready?” At Dudley’s nod, she began again. Harry counted the stitches. One, two, three, four on the first wound. One, two, three, four, five on the second. This time, Petunia continued without stopping. One two, three, four stitches on the third.

“There you go. I’m going to call animal control to get those birds off of our roof, you boys go do your homework. If you finish early, I’ll let you have some ice cream before dinner, okay?” Dudley and Harry smiled at each other and raced upstairs to finish their homework as quick as possible.

~~~~

Albus Dumbledore was pleased. Yesterday, the yearly Hogwarts admission letters had been sent out. Upon checking the list of students that letters were sent to, he was surprised not to see a certain Harry Potter on the list. _No matter,_ Dumbledore had thought. Of course it meant that the blood wards were simply so strong that even Hogwarts herself was unable to find Harry. This in itself showed that he was perfectly correct in his assumptions about the wards, no matter Minerva’s hesitations.

Dumbledore had personally filled in the blanks of a letter and addressed an envelope to Number 4 Privet Drive. As an afterthought, he made a few extra copies just incase. He sent off one letter with an owl, but when the owl came back empty handed only mere hours later, he frowned. Perhaps the owls themselves were having difficulties? _No matter,_ thought Dumbledore, sending off twenty five birds. _One of these ought to find him._

The next day, twenty four birds returned to Dumbledore’s office, letters unopened.

~~~~

“Harry, be a dear and pick up the mail, will you?” came Vernon’s low voice from the living room on Thursday evening. “I forgot to grab it this morning.” Harry walked over to the front door and picked up the mail, flipping through it to see what the day had brought.

“I got mail?” exclaimed Harry. Harry _never_ got mail. Afterall, no one was sending him bills or advertisements.

Thundering footsteps rounded the corner into the front hall and Harry looked up, seeing a red-faced Vernon holding his hand out to Harry.

“Give it here,” he said, pretending to be nonchalant.

“No!” shouted Harry. “I mean… I’m sorry, you can see it, but can I at least read it first?” Vernon stared down at him.

“I… suppose.”

Harry took a seat on a sofa and slowly opened the letter with his aunt and uncle hovering nervously over his shoulders.

 

HOGWARTS SCHOOL _of_ WITCHCRAFT _and_ WIZARDRY

Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore _(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock,_

_Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)_

Dear Mr. Potter,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins on 1 September. We await your owl by no later than 31 July.

Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall

Deputy Headmistress

 

Harry laughed out loud. _This must be a joke. Magic isn’t real, and even if it was, I want to be a doctor, not “Supreme Mugwump”, whatever that means,_ he thought.

“Well it would be rude not too reply,” said Harry, unaware of his aunt’s quivering form. “Could someone please fetch me a pen and some paper?” Vernon turned shakily and grabbed what Harry asked for.

“Thanks.”

 

_Dear Professor McGonagall,_

_I regret to inform you that I will not be attending Hogwarts School of “Witchcraft” and “Wizardry”. I won’t be buying any such supplies._

_I will be attending Smeltings next year with my cousin, Dudley. Thank you for the laugh._

_Sincerely,_

_Harry Potter_

_Average Boy_

 

Petunia and Vernon breathed a simultaneous sigh of relief as they read Harry’s words.

“How do they expect me to send this by owl? Do you think if I leave it outside they’ll get it?” at the horrified looks on their faces, Harry continued. “I’m kidding. I know this is a prank.” Harry opened the front door and placed the letter on the doorstep. As he turned back around, an owl swooped down and picked up the letter. Harry never noticed.

~~~~

“WHAT?”

Minerva covered her ears as the booming voice dissipated. “I said… he did not… accept… the offer…” she repeated with gritted teeth. The windows in Albus’s office shattered, and the various models throughout the room whirred wildly.

“He. He can’t! You can’t do that! You can’t reject a Hogwarts letter! Harry Potter can NOT reject a Hogwarts letter!” shouted Albus, storming around the office. Minerva silently repaired the windows and banished Albus into his chair. She held out the bowl of lemon drops and Albus tossed a small handful into his mouth, pressing his fingertips to his forehead.

“Minerva. I insist that you look up the rules on acceptance into Hogwarts. Now.” She rushed out the door to the library.

“Irma? Have you any books on the nature of the acceptance letter?” Minerva asked, striding through the doors. Irma looked up from her cataloguing.

“Of course, dear. Follow me.” Minerva followed across the library, past two short counters, and through a pathway of towering shelves that seemed to stretch on forever. Finally, Irma stopped. She traced her finger down the side of one shelf, and it moved, sort of as a lift would, until the desired shelf was in front of them. Irma pulled a rather dusty book from the shelf and turned around.

“Here you are. Do return it soon,” she advised, handing the book to Minerva. _Magically Binding Contracts and How to Interpret Them_ , read Minerva.

“Of course! Tonight?” she asked, voice dropping slightly.

Irma smiled knowingly. “Sounds wonderful,” she said. “I’ll see you then.”

Minerva left the library with a spring in her step and wandered back up to Albus’s office. She knocked twice on his door and let herself in, placing the book on his desk.

“Get that back to me by tonight.”

Albus nodded, but inside, he was fuming.


End file.
